


bonfire

by natromanoffs



Category: Victorious (TV)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-22
Updated: 2019-11-22
Packaged: 2021-02-17 23:29:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,254
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21518236
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/natromanoffs/pseuds/natromanoffs
Summary: robbie has changed a lot since high school. and looking back on it, there were some issues that were never addressed.
Comments: 6
Kudos: 38





	bonfire

He’s not sure why they never talked about it. It was easy to see, to notice. But they never discussed it.

Almost all of his high school friend group was mentally ill. Robbie can see that now.

Cat had obvious issues. Jade clearly had some masochistic and sadistic tendencies, and her relationship with Beck was problematic if not toxic. Beck appeared fairly level-headed, but still, his relationship with Jade raised some red flags. Tori and Andre seemed to be doing the best out of the bunch, but Robbie would be lying if he said he thought their heads were always filled with sunshine and rainbows. And then there was Trina. Though she wasn’t quite a part of their friend group, she was around quite often, and was displaying some personality issues. She clearly had narcissistic personality disorder, with a helping of histrionic personality disorder on the side.

Sweet Cat. They all knew she had some bipolar tendencies, and it was clear that mental illness ran in her family. Though they knew these things, they never helped her through them. Never really talked about them directly. They’d just change the subject, ignore her, or distract her with some other task. 

On one of the most memorable days of Robbie’s high school life, Rex had gotten sucked into a tornado. And Cat found herself in a mental ward. 

When the group found out that Cat had been in a mental ward, they paid no mind to it. They figured she was just placed there because the nurse had heard her talking about a puppet getting sucked into a tornado. That had really happened, so it seemed that the whole ordeal was just a mistake. But when Cat told them what happened, she mentioned that the doctors said she should see a specialist. She laughed it off, so the group of friends did too. But looking back, Robbie can’t believe they didn’t address this. It was clear from that statement alone that Cat had deep-seated issues, more issues than slightly bipolar behavior.

And, of course, Robbie and his issues. He really carried a ventriloquist dummy around for all of high school and all it did was make him weird. Sure, it was Hollywood Arts, and ventriloquism wasn’t too far from the sorts of odd skills held by the students there. Still, the way Rex talked and acted and treated Robbie… He’s not sure how he didn’t get sent to a mental ward.

Looking back now, Robbie knows what Rex was. Well, he wasn’t a puppet, but he was a ventriloquist dummy. At first, Rex had been a good idea. Robbie was good at ventriloquism, really good, and it was a cool skill to have. And Rex had been a way for him to express parts of him that he couldn’t otherwise. Rex was cool, and blunt, and could talk to girls without breaking out in a sweat. Yeah, at first, Rex had just been a talent and a bolder version of Robbie. But somewhere along the way, things changed. Rex got meaner, and he began to voice all the terrible things Robbie thought about himself. And Robbie changed too. Rex was no longer an extension of him, but something else entirely. And yes, on that day when Rex was lying in the hospital bed, Robbie was scared. He was scared of Rex dying. Because at that point, Rex had become real to him. At that point, Rex was an entity entirely separate from Robbie, aside from the hand up the ass. Even though Robbie was the one projecting his own voice for Rex, he wasn’t aware of this. He didn’t have control over what Rex said anymore, or at least it didn’t feel like it. So, Rex almost dying was one of the worst days of Robbie’s life. Yes, even though Rex constantly berated and verbally abused him, Robbie was attached.

In conclusion, high school was a mess. After they graduated, they all went to separate schools. And although they kept up with each other on social media and weekly Skype calls at first, they soon fell out of touch. A few weeks into college and Robbie was no longer speaking with the people he’d recently considered his best friends.

Being a boy with a ventriloquist dummy in college turned out to be a bad idea. Robbie only made it a month in the semester before dropping out of college entirely.

After hearing what everyone at college had said to him, Robbie began to think a little differently. He didn’t go to an arts school anymore. He had ended up going to a large public college, where he had been majoring in visual media production. He brought Rex with him because he couldn’t not. But everyone at school gave him weird looks and asked him questions about it. And when Rex started talking to people, they freaked out. Especially when they realized that Robbie acted like he was separate from Rex.

So, with the advice of his advisor, he dropped out of college to focus on his mental health. Looking back on it, it was the best damn decision he ever made.

He began to see a therapist. This therapist, after hearing many of Robbie’s high school stories, suggested Robbie further distance himself from his high school friends. So, Robbie unfollowed them all on all social media platforms, deleted all of their numbers. It was scary, but ultimately for the best.

It’s been two years now since Robbie dropped out of college. He sees his therapist twice a week, which is as often as he can afford. Seeing a therapist has done wonders for Robbie’s mental health, and he’d go every day if he could afford to. His therapist still hasn’t quite figured out what was wrong with Robbie. There were some signs of schizophrenia, but it wasn’t quite that. It was all made more complicated by the fact that Robbie really thought his own voice was someone else. He’s on a couple different medications now, which help.

And he’s got rid of Rex. Burned him in an extremely challenging but therapeutic bonfire. 

Now, Robbie works as a waiter at a small diner. He lives by himself in a little apartment. He and his therapist both decided it was best for Robbie to avoid his parents for a while. Robbie thinks he might start taking classes at a nearby community college. But he needs a little bit more time. And a little bit more money.

Deleting the numbers of all of his high school friends means that Robbie doesn’t keep in touch with anyone from high school anymore. It is for the best. With them gone, Rex gone, and his parents gone, Robbie doesn’t have to come into contact with reminders of his old life.

He does wonder, sometimes. How they’re all doing. If they’re all on their way to becoming great big Hollywood stars or if any of them, like him, took a bit of a different path. He hopes they’re growing different from who they were in high school. He hopes that those who needed it are getting mental help. He especially hopes about Cat. He hopes she’s stable. He hopes she’s happy.

Currently, Robbie is doing pretty good. He’s certainly not perfect, and he’s not quite okay either. He’s still working with his therapist to address some of his problems. But he’s doing better than he was in high school. And he hopes the rest of his high school friends can say the same.

**Author's Note:**

> hi. like everyone, i've been watching victorious on netflix and reconnecting hard with these characters i used to be so obsessed with. after watching the 'rex dies' episodes, my psychology student ass got in her feelings and this is the result lol


End file.
